How To Handle Sleep Schedules Around Special Events

If you’ve hung out here on The Mindful Nursery’s blog, scrolled through our Instagram account, or really just talked to me at any length about baby sleep, you’re probably tired of hearing me talk about how important consistency is…but it really is SO important! I truly could go on and on about how if you do nothing else for your child’s sleep except bring some consistency to it, you can help it improve tenfold. This is all good and well, but what does that mean when it comes to special events? Can you just not go to another wedding as long as you have a little one? Do you need to skip their toddler bestie’s birthday party because it is during naptime? What about when you’re at a family dinner party that you just know is going to go past bedtime? What do you do with consistency then? Well, I’m glad you asked because I wrote an entire blog post below talking about just that.

We all have life events that come up and disruptions in our schedule that we have to account for in our days and weeks. I do not know anyone who has a schedule that is exactly the same day after day. There are weddings and parties and lunches and playgroups and doctor appointments and so many other things that come up in our week that make having a completely consistent and predictable routine impossible. Yet, I always tell people to strive for consistency in their child’s sleep schedule.

So how do we match these things up?

First off, a lot of the reason I push consistency when I work with clients, is that the more consistency that you give a child, the more flexible they will actually be with their schedule. It seems counterintuitive, but the longer I’ve worked with infants and toddlers, the more I’m convinced that everything with them tends to be that way. What I mean by this, is that when you’re implementing sleep training, starting a new schedule, or changing something such as dropping a nap, do it during a week where you do have the ability to have a very consistent and predictable schedule. Give yourself one week of “we’re probably going to be bored and feel like we have cabin fever in our own house,” to implement the change before throwing in scheduling curve balls. (I’m writing this post while we have been snowed in for a week, so I know the pain! But it is worth it!) When I write a sleep plan for my clients I tell them this, but I don’t expect they’ll follow the schedule to a t every day of the child’s life. So when you are introducing or changing something about their routine, go really heavy on the consistency. Once they’ve settled into the change, then you can introduce a bit more flexibility into their schedule.

The next half of when consistency is important, is just as much as possible in general. Try and give baby a lot of days where they have a predictable schedule, but you do not have to be ruled by that schedule. It is all about balance, and isn’t all of life? So still go to that inconveniently timed playgroup or story time. Take them to the family wedding, (**if and only if the couple has invited kids!**). Stay later than you planned at that special fun event that’s running past bedtime. Don’t do this every day, but definitely do it!

So how do you navigate going about this?

Be flexible, set good expectations, and plan ahead.

The first thing I tell parents, is that if you have a big event where your child’s sleep schedule will be way off and/or they’ll get much less sleep than normal, plan for as low key of a day as possible the next day, and expect that it will be a little tougher than normal, and that is totally okay. Just give your child the space they need to feel those big overtired feels, to catch up on the missed sleep, and to reset and readjust back to their typical schedule. 

Get sleep where you can

If you know it is going to be an extra late night, let nap run a little long or offer them an additional nap that they do not usually take. If an event falls right during nap time, try a cat nap on either side of the event instead. You can also offer an earlier bedtime. Sleep begets sleep, so just try sneaking in those hours and minutes wherever possible on days you need to adjust the schedule, and that will help make the adjustment back to the normal schedule the next day a bit easier. What we want to prevent as much as possible (while acknowledging that it is going to happen, and that is okay!) is your child becoming overtired, or too overtired. 

Maintain consistency outside of the schedule and adjust back

Even though you cannot maintain perfect consistency with their schedule when working around special events, still maintain consistency where you are able. This means keeping their sleep environment as consistent as possible. If you are traveling for the event, recreate the home environment to the best of your ability. Put them to bed using the same bedtime or nap time routine that you normally do. Most importantly do not introduce new sleep aids. This is easier with your expectations set that the days following a shift in schedule are going to be a little tougher, and that can help you mentally ride them out a little better instead of reaching for a new sleep aid out of desperation. These will only create new bad habits that will be harder to break in the long run.

Special events are a part of life, and a wonderful part of life! It would be impossible for the event planners in our lives to always follow what is convenient for our child’s sleep schedule, and that is okay! If you give your child consistency while they are learning good sleep and the majority of the time in general, it will actually set them up to adjust to shifts in their schedules and handle them better than they otherwise would. So get out on that dance floor mama and don’t stress for another minute about bedtime! That will take care of itself in due time. 

~Becca